Double the Trouble – the Trouble with Twins

Double the Trouble:  Part One of a two-part series on the trouble – and blessings – of twins.

Ever hear the phrase “double the trouble”?  I hear it all of the time, along with “twice the blessings”.  While these clichés don’t particularly bother me, they do make me pause to think.

Double the Trouble?  Oh…..let me count the ways……

  1. Two boobs to nurse two children.  It doesn’t exactly work like it should.  You’d think it’d work, right?  Wrong.  For oh, so many reasons
  2. Less sleep.  Keep them on the same schedule, they say.  Wake one up when the other wakes up, they say.  Right.  That’s like keeping two non-twin siblings on the same schedule.  Everyone has their own circadian rhythm.
  3. Teething.  Need I say more?  Really?
  4. Illness.  Oh good Lord!  Which baby do I comfort first?  They are both sick and screaming!
  5. Mobile babies.  Uf da’s.  That’s all I gotta say.  You know, I thought it was hard before they could walk….
  6. Feeding twins.  Seriously.  Sometimes you feel like all you do is shovel it in.
  7. Twins who self-feed.  And I thought feeding them was tough!  I never experienced such disaster!
  8. Eating my own meal.  Up.,Down.  Up, Down.  More this.  More that.  Up, Down.
  9. Sharing.  Have you ever seen the Toddler’s Rules of Possession?
  10. Tantrums. How do you maneuver two 2-year-olds who are having melt-downs?  Their bodies are all stiff and rigid….and snot-covered.
  11. Crying. Seriously. Double the hysterics. Double the volume.  Double the pitch – and it’s the highest, glass-shattering, earth-moving wail……
  12. Messed up bedtime routines.  Bring on the tantrums.
  13. Horse-playing.  You’d think it is good.  But the squeals of joy are ear-piecing.  And it’s double the owies.
  14. Going. ANYWHERE.  I used to think it was hard with one baby.  I am now a serious hermit.  If I never leave again….it will be too soon.
  15. Bath time. Who knew two wet, wiggly babes could cause such ruckus?
  16. Using the bathroom. Seriously.  I have one on my lap and one crying because he is not on my lap.  Oh, and a four-year-old, supervising the whole process.
  17. Playing outside.  Who would’a thought?  I have one in the backyard, perfectly content, and one running to the front. Oh the conundrum!
  18. Potty-training. You would think it’d be easy, like killing two birds with one stone.  Hmm…I need multiple stones.
  19. Talking.  We all wait for our children’s first words.  “Mom.  Mom.  Mom.  Mom.  Mom.  Mom.”  That is my day.
  20. Getting ready. Twice the shoes. Twice the coats.  Twice the tantrums.
  21. Independence. Remember when your son wanted to dress himself?  Remember how long that took?  Yeah…..twice that.
  22. Mischievousness. Yes, every child has a tish bit of mischievousness.  Twins feed off of each other.  It’s like two naughty cats.
  23. Fights.  Whatever you do, don’t say “Just go kick his a*#!” in frustration,  because he will. Trust me.

 

Yeah, double the trouble.  Who can argue?  But trouble is oh, so sweet!

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